Saturday, October 3, 2009

Breaking the Mold...Literally


Never before has society been so fixated on looks. Everywhere you look people are dieting and trying to get in shape to meet modern standards of beauty and attractiveness. I myself have recently started a health binge in order to lose weight. Yet there are some who refuse to conform to societies view and choose instead to go the opposite way. While some may look to buy smaller clothes and feel better about themselves these men rise look to add body mass and attain their own gravitational pull.

This is not an attack on overweight people. I myself am overweight. This is merely a celebration of fat athletes who succeed in professional sports despite their weight.

Here are a few men who are fat and proud:

CC Sabathia

Carbs and Calories Sabathia has been a professional baseball player for 9 years. In those 9 years he has been the heaviest baseball player in history tipping the scales at a rotund 300lbs. His neck rolls are numerous and his uniform looks like billowy pajamas. Despite these "handicaps" he has been a dominant pitcher and even won a CY Young award in 2007. Does he plan on losing weight anytime soon? Of course not. Why mess with a good thing?


Prince Fielder

An excerpt from Moneyball by Michael Lewis, "How about Prince Fielder? Isn't he a little heavy? It says here he is 265lbs. How much does he weigh if he puts the other foot on the scale?"

At the end of his 5th year Prince has a .283 career batting average and has hit 153 HR with 438 RBI. The man is one of the best power hitters in the league today and hits absolute bombs. Does his huge gut help him generate power? Probably not but it doesn't seem to be hurting him either.



Jerome Bettis

Here is a man who played professional football while suffering with severe asthma. How can you be a running back in football is you have asthma. I will tell you how. You do what Bettis did and make a career out of being a bowling ball. By this I mean he packed on the pounds and would literally fall forward to get yards.

In his early days he was slimmer and could break long runs but as he aged he got fatter and became the best 3rd down back in the NFL. For his career he averaged 3.9 yards per carry which is roughly the distance his fat ass covered as he hit the ground after falling forward.


Every Lineman in the NFL

These guys make a living off being fat. Guys like Gilbert Brown, Sam Adams, Ted Washington and Vince Wilfork all had jobs because they were fat and could clog up running lanes. These guys push 400lbs and yet are professional athletes. Good for them. They show people that you can just get really fat and then play football. Now don't get me wrong I am not saying they aren't athletic or that they are only successful because they are fat but it is a fact that it is harder to move a guy who weighs 355lbs than it is to move a guy who weighs 285lbs.

The NFL is really a league that promotes being massive. Offensive linemen have to be big in order to stop the big guys on the other side of the ball and vice versa. Of the 22 players on the field at any given time usually at least 9 of them will weigh close to 300lbs. Gotta love it.


John Daly

While Tiger Woods may be the best golfer in the entire world he probably isn't the most popular. That award goes to the man in the ugly pants John Daly. Daly smokes, gambles, divorces women like he is Henry VIII and eats like a true American. He has made a career out of being the outcast in golf because he is fat and doesn't really care what people think. Daly breaks every stereotype of the modern golfer and does it while rocking a 46' waist.


Big Baby

Glen Davis currently plays for the Boston Celtics in the NBA. He is called big baby because he is a large man and is also very emotional often crying while on the bench in moments of joy and frustration. He also rocks some nice B cups as pictured below:


Here are a few more guys who are fat and proud:

Antonio Alfonseca - 34 inch waist, 64 inch gut. That belt is working harder than Alfonseca has worked his entire career.

Babe Ruth - The Sultan of Swat indulged in women, booze, and food. After all that he is still considered by many as the best baseball player of all time. And he accomplished all that while pushing three bills.

Charles Barkley - Quick, whats higher Charles Barkley's weight or his gambling debt? Former MVP, 11x All-Star, and 5x All-NBA First Team.

David Wells - Brings new meaning to the term hefty lefty. Any pitcher that can consume enormous quantities of beer and the pitch perfect games will make the list every time.

Livan Hernandez - One more cheeseburger and he would have to be airlifted from the dugout to the mound to pitch every inning.


Random YouTube Video

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