Thursday, May 28, 2009


Did you happen to see Jose Canseco make his MMA debut the other night against that giant Asian dude.  He got worked!
- Justin, Maine

Not only did he catch a beating but he did so wearing Lulu Lemon pants!  Down right embarrassing but he may bounce back and looks like he has the skills to beat Kimbo or the Headhunter.

In all seriousness though Canseco is actually a massive idiot.  After his playing career ended he should have stuck to writing books that were factually correct like his first one.  He ratted on everyone and was telling the truth when everyone called him a liar.  If he had simply stuck to baseball and not reality tv and MMA he wouldn't be such a massive joke.

The Jays blew a 5 run lead today and have now lost 9 in a row being swept by the Red Sox, Braves, and Orioles.  When will they win again?
-Paul, Toronto

I was going to write an article on the Jays for awhile but decided I would wait until they played the Red Sox and look what happened.  The Sox sweep the Jays and kick off a losing streak of epic proportions.  I knew the Jays hot start couldn't continue and they couldn't keep relying on guys like Cecil and Ray to be good.

The Jays have wasted 2 quality starts from Halladay now which means they are back to their old selves.  3rd place here they come.

Cavs down 3-1 in their series with the Magic and the Lakers tied 2-2 with the Nuggets.  Chances the dream Kobe-LeBron finals match doesn't happen.
- Doug, Cleveland

Only 8 teams have ever come back from a 3-1 deficit so it doesn't look good for the Cavs.  Added to this is the fact that LeBron is literally the only on the team doing anything.  He is carrying the ball up the floor, playing defense, and scoring all the points.  He has also become pretty selfish though taking way too many stupid shots because he feels all the pressure is on him.  The Cavs are being exposed as a 1 man team and are done.

As for the Lakers they won tonight so its 3-2 in the series.  They looked good and now that they have home court they should win the series. 

I don't think there is anything wrong with a Lakers-Magic Finals or a Nuggets-Magic finals. Both of those series would be interesting to watch and would be quality basketball.  As long as the Magic and their porn producer of a head coach don't win then it is all good.

Looks like it is going to be Penguins-Red Wings again for the Stanley Cup.  Does Pitt stand a chance when the only difference in their team is Chris Kunitz and the loss of Marion Hossa?
- Don, Pittsburgh

It doesn't look good for the Pens considering the Wings have pretty much the same team as last year plus Hossa. There is one saving grace for the Pens though and that is injuries.  The Wings are banged up pretty bad and are missing Lindstrom, Datsyuk, and possibly Cleary.  Since the Wings won tonight the Finals will start on Saturday which gives the Wings only 2 days to recover so that boads well for the Pens.

It will be a long shot but I think the memory of how they lost last year will help the Pens in the long run and will give them the motivation needed to win it all.  Pens in 7.

You clearly have a hardon for the Red Sox which makes sense because you seem like a %$#. How do you like Big Papi's 1 HR and Jon Lester's 8,000 ERA?
- Anonymous

The blow is softened by that plush cushion known as the division lead...douchebag.

WTF is with this new movie Drag me to Hell?  Apparently it is about some girl who gets cursed because she denied some crazy old woman a bank loan.  Worst plot ever?
- Kelly, Toronto

"The Toro cheerleading squad from Rancho Carne High School in San Diego has got spirit, spunk, sass and a killer routine that's sure to land them the national championship trophy for the sixth year in a row. But for newly-elected team captain Torrance, the Toros' road to total cheer glory takes a shady turn when she discovers that their perfectly-choreographed routines were in fact stolen from the Clovers, a hip-hop squad from East Compton, by the Toro's former captain. While the Toros scramble to come up with a new routine, the Clovers, led by squad captain Isis have their own problems - coming up with enough money to cover their travel expenses to the championships. With time running out and the pressure mounting, both captains drive their squads to the point of exhaustion: Torrance, hell bent on saving the Toros' reputation, and Isis more determined than ever to see that the Clovers finally get the recognition that they deserve. But only one team can bring home the title, so may the best moves win."

I present the worst movie plot of all time.  Bring it On!

Random Youtube Video (Best 3 minutes and 52 seconds in Movie History)

1 comment:

Draper004 said...

First of all, do you really get readers from all over the place like Pittsburgh? Where did that mail even come from?

Second of all, bring it on = AMAZING. I might have seen it like 9 times, 3 of those being in theatres.